I supposed my last post of 2005 will recap what happened over Christmas break in Vegas.
Then again, I can also not.
The summary would be:
1. So many adult entertainment billboards...
2. Clubs are easy to sneak into, apparently
3. Matchbooks are fun
4. Bring Chapstick
5. Bring a fucking sweater
6. Just because you can, doesn't mean you should
7. Roommate is just a dandy euphemism for suitor
8. For every one When September End's, there are six Laffy Taffy's
9. Failure at proving whatever happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas (Yes, Carly, I'm talking about you)
10. Friends in the postal office are awesome
11. Asian women don't know the word "aging"
12. It's the guy's job to know all the details so the girls can lie however they want.
13. Suburban Vegas > Downtown Vegas
14. Red Light game, 50 cents. Difficulty: medium. Profit: $3.24 each. Invested: $8.50 Accrued: ~$15 Score.
15. Bi is the new gay, XD
16. People who live in LV call themselves the Vegans.
17. Pearl milk tea cost 3.99 in LV, tax not included. Here, they cost a buck. $1.08 wth tax.
18. Not all cocktail waitresses are sleazy or scantily clad
19. The Bellagio has high class, executive-looking, make-up-ful, high-class-whore-like cocktail waitresses.
20. The Vegas Hilton has Showgirl-style waitresses
21. The Royal Coast has a pretty buffet, but the waitresses are pretty ugly
22. The Paris LV has decent looking cocktail waitresses
23. Monorail = ripoff.
24. Luxor = best arcade/DDR
25. Circus Circus = best games/worst DDR
26. Chinatown = Craptastic service
27. If store employees of the same sex hit on you, it's time to leave the store
28. Traveling adult entertainment billboards MUST have girls in them...they just gotta! (For swift delivery purposes, duh.)
29. MM...Ethel M gooooooooood...
30. Best. Sushi. Bar. Ever.
Well, that's 30 things about my trip in Vegas.
Happy New Years, folks. Hope you're having fun.
And the wind brought Clive @ 10:32 PM
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Saturday, December 31, 2005 |
I've been real busy lately, no time to update. But I've decided to start doing a little writing, here's some angst for us.
1.
A boy sits quietly in his English class. He looks down at the table and sees his jumbled mess of letters, the most prominent being the big, red mark of failure that glares at the top of the page. He looks at his teacher with shining eyes. The teacher studies the boy's sordid look, and writes the words "Think Figuratively" on the whiteboard, in the same shade of glaring red. The teacher goes to her desk to get a soda and a very long straw. She opens the soda, inserts the straw, and takes one slow, long drink.
The boy sat still for a couple of seconds, understanding. He rubbed his eyes to clear his vision, then took out a permanent marker. With the marker, he wrote "bitch" on the back of his hand, walked up to the teacher, and delivered one powerful backhand to his teacher's face. The boy begins to walk out of the room, and without looking back, he said:
"Silence may be golden, but actions are priceless."
2.
"Tell me what happens when we fly into space, momma."
"Why, you'll meet the aliens."
"Tell me what happens when we sail around the world, poppa."
"Why, you'll reached the other shore."
"Momma, Poppa, tell me what happens if we find the end of a rainbow."
"Why, you'll find some leprechaun gold under it."
"Why, you'll find the end of the goddamned rainbow."
"Momma, poppa, tell me what happens when we die?"
"Why honey, you'll go to heaven with God and momma, where there's no poppa to lie to you."
"Why honey, you'll go to hell with momma, where there's a whole bunch of disillusioned bitches like her."
3.
"Sir, see that sign? It says '45 MPH'. You were at 70MPH"
"Sir, see my finger? It says I'm trigger happy."
4.
A single tear rolled down her cheek as she ran towards him. He had his back turned towards her.
"You shouldn't come near me anymore."
"But I lo..."
"Don't finish that thought."
"But I really do."
"Oh yea?"
He reached inside his shirt, and pulled out his wallet, and threw it back towards her to the floor. She picked up the wallet and looked inside to see a recent picture of him, another woman, and 2 toddlers, all beaming, in front of a new Trailer home. Shock registered itself on the woman's face.
"How could you...?"
"I'm sorry, I..."
"Don't finish that thought. How could you lie to me? I thought you said you had millions!"
"I'm sorry I never got you your gold tiaras, silver bracelets, and platinum neklaces."
"You're just like all the other low-lives!"
"You're just like a blood-sucking whore."
5.
"How should I live my life?" I ask myself.
"Travel, spread out, explore!" said the nearby dandelion patch.
And so I did.
"How should I live my life?" I ask myself again.
"Find love, get married, have children!" said the nearby rosebush.
And so I did.
"How should I live my life now?" I ask myself yet again.
"Now you die, duh" sneered the Canna Flower, as it wilted.
And so I did.
-----
GonE
And the wind brought Clive @ 8:53 PM
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Tuesday, December 20, 2005 |
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